Well, that's it. It's May, and I'm out of school, so I'm going to try to be as optimistic as possible.

But I'd rather end on good notes, so before I get to the optimism...
I was filling out job applications to corner stores, and restaurants, and many of them ask, "Do you feel you are successful?"
Every time before this point I was without hesitation able to answer yes. But now I'm not so sure. When I think about it, I'm applying to these places because no real geography internship opportunities would hire me, or they would claim they wanted something that I didn't have ex. background in atmospheric sciences, media, politics etc. (I specialize in urban planning and computer-aided geography). So I can't help but feel resentful that on my last real summer break I can't even get something significant enough to boost my experience or resume  
I'm pushing 3.1 cumulative GPA, but I can't help but feel like my levels of success are real...default. You go to college and do well...while others are the President of Undergraduate Clubs, locally recognized for their 25 page research paper, studying abroad in China or Switzerland, internship at ESRI [link] , and I mean, you can get involved but it takes a lot more than getting involved to get recognized for something. I just worry that when I graduate and apply, that my degree and resume won't be good enough to land a job. And when I have to think about applying to McDonald's just because they're hiring, it just hurts

Anyway, both my parents said that they're both very proud of me of how I'm keeping up and all the knowledge that I'm learning, which just was the biggest relief and reassurance in the world I finished 3 years of college and I'm just one year away from getting my bachelor's degree. So, I power through this and hope for the best.

Now, on the plus side...
I did have another gig alright! The magazine asked me to perform "I Am a Tree" [link] at the Honors House magazine party a month ago which really was a dream come true! Great turnout, audience, food, and conversation up in there, and they loved it! These performances sure don't come by often so I have to cherish it when they do!

And, ironically compared to everything said above, I actually...won an award And got invited to an award ceremony, at a
fancy-@** hotel Interestingly enough, I almost wasn't going to go because when I was a freshman in architecture they invited me to award ceremonies: "Come watch the award ceremony featuring the senior projects and graduating students!" (You're not in it but come watch the others anyway!)
I ran into my advisor while getting breakfast at the geography building and she's like, "Are you going to the award ceremony??!"
And I'm like: "Who's going to be there?"
"Graduating students...and award recipients."
Me: "Are you saying I won an award??"
Advisor: "YES!"
So, yeah the award added a nice little bonus to my bank account, nothing huge, but always something to be grateful for. And summer's here and I get to kick back and relax without any deadlines. So job or no job, I'll strive to make the most of it

Anyway, thanks for reading Peace